How to Write a Eulogy: A Practical Guide to Honouring a Life

Being asked to deliver a eulogy is a genuine honour, but it almost always comes when you’re already grieving and completely overwhelmed. It feels like one of those critical life skills no one ever actually teaches you, leaving you to try and figure it out on your own. That’s exactly why this guide is part of our Life Skills No One Teaches You series. We’re here to cut through the noise and give you a direct, grounded approach so you know exactly how to write a eulogy that feels right.

This guide is focused on the outcome for you: to feel confident, prepared, and capable of delivering a tribute that truly honours the person you’ve lost, without adding to your stress.

Your Guide on How to Write a Eulogy When Words Fail

A man writes in a notebook at a wooden desk with a framed photo nearby, sunlight streaming in. How to write a Eulogy.

Let’s reframe this. This isn’t a burden; it’s a final act of love. You don’t need to be a professional writer or a seasoned public speaker to get this right. You just need to be you. Sincerity is what matters here. Your presence and your words are a gift to everyone in the room.

The whole process of knowing how to write a eulogy really just boils down to four things: gathering some meaningful stories, putting them into a simple structure, writing from the heart, and having a quick practice run. This guide will walk you through it, making sure what you create feels authentic and truly honours the person you’re remembering. This structured method is designed to benefit you by reducing the overwhelm and giving you a clear path forward.

Why This Task Matters More Than You Think

Writing a eulogy goes way beyond just giving a speech. It’s a chance for you to process your own feelings and help everyone else in the room begin to heal. A heartfelt tribute can:

Offer comfort: Sharing positive, personal stories reminds grieving family and friends of the joy that person brought into the world.
Celebrate a life: The main job of a eulogy is to celebrate who the person really was: their unique personality, their passions, their character.
Create connection: Your stories build a bridge between everyone there, creating a shared moment of remembrance and honour.

You don’t need to be a professional writer to deliver a powerful tribute. The most memorable eulogies are built on sincerity and specific, personal stories, not on complex language or grand statements.

A Structured Approach to Reduce Overwhelm

The key to getting this done without feeling completely crushed is to break it down. Staring at a blank page is intimidating for anyone, so we’re not going to start there. Instead, we’ll begin by gathering the raw materials: the memories, anecdotes, and little quirks that made your loved one who they were. This step-by-step process ensures you know how to write a eulogy without the usual stress.

It’s completely normal to feel daunted by the idea of speaking at a funeral. Thankfully, there are resources out there with solid advice on how to write a eulogy that can help you create something that truly honours the person you’ve lost. Think of this guide as your roadmap to finding the right words and the confidence to share them.

Sometimes, the emotional weight of it all just makes it hard to think clearly. If you’re feeling stuck, remember you don’t have to do it alone. At Your Bro, we offer coaching that can act as a sounding board, helping you navigate these tough moments. It’s not therapy; it’s about providing support for clarity and helping you manage your emotions to get through hard times. A free discovery call can show you how a bit of grounded guidance can make all the difference.

Gathering Memories Without the Overwhelm

Hands carefully sorting through a stack of old black and white photographs, with coffee and a notebook nearby.

Before you even think about writing a single word, you need the raw materials. This is where you dig for the stories, quirks, and moments that made them who they were. The goal is to collect these memories without feeling like you’re being crushed by the weight of it all. This process will directly benefit you by making the writing stage much simpler.

Don’t try to recall their entire life story at once; you’ll just stare at a blank page. Start small. The best eulogies are built on specific, personal details, not vague praise. A good story about their terrible but enthusiastic singing is far more memorable than just saying “they loved music”.

This part of the process isn’t just about writing a speech; it’s a powerful way to reflect on a life well-lived. The process of learning how to write a eulogy often brings incredible clarity to our own values and what truly matters.

Asking the Right Questions

Generic prompts rarely help when you’re grieving. Your mind is foggy, and being told to “think of a good memory” can feel impossible. Instead, use specific questions to get your own mind and the minds of others working.

What’s a small, everyday habit they had that was so them? (Like how they always folded the newspaper a certain way).
What’s a piece of advice they gave you that actually stuck with you?
What was their go-to story to tell at family gatherings?
What’s something you disagreed on that you can now smile about?

Make sure you talk to other family members and friends. Their perspectives will add colour and depth you might have missed. Everyone has a different relationship with the person, and hearing their stories gives you a much fuller picture to draw from.

Organise Your Thoughts Simply

Right, you’ve got some ideas floating around. You need to get them down before they disappear. Forget about perfection for now; just get the thoughts out of your head and onto a page. This will benefit you later by providing a rich resource to pull from.

A simple mind map or even the notes app on your phone is all you need. Create a few categories and start dropping your memories into them. This breaks the intimidating task of learning how to write a eulogy into smaller, more manageable pieces.

Simple Categories for Your Notes:

Funny Stories: The time they tried to bake a cake and used salt instead of sugar.
Life Lessons: That conversation where they taught you something about resilience or kindness.
Defining Traits: Their unwavering honesty, their infectious laugh, their quiet generosity.
Their Impact: How they mentored a junior colleague or supported a mate through a tough time.

This approach lines up with how funerals in Australia have been changing. Research shows 61% of Aussies now see funerals as celebrations of life, not just solemn events. These services often swap out traditional liturgies for personal stories, making the memories you gather even more crucial.

The goal here is collection, not creation. You’re just gathering the building blocks. There’s no pressure to write beautiful sentences or connect the dots just yet. Just collect the moments that matter.

This process of looking back can be powerful in its own right. Journaling your memories can be a therapeutic way to organise your thoughts and process your feelings. You might find some value in our guide on self improvement journaling.

If you’re finding it tough to sort through the emotions that come with this, a free discovery call with Your Bro can offer a grounded space to find some clarity. We’re here to offer support, not therapy, helping you get through these hard moments one step at a time. To honour their legacy beyond the speech, you might also want to explore some Creative Ideas for Remembering Deceased Loved Ones.

Structuring Your Eulogy For A Powerful Message

Three sticky notes labeled 'Opening', 'Body', 'Closing' outlining a structure on a desk.

This is often the hardest part. Staring at a blank page with a head full of memories and a heavy heart can feel paralysing. But the good news is, you don’t need to reinvent the wheel here. A simple, time-tested structure will give your stories shape and help you transform your jumbled notes into a powerful tribute. Having a clear structure is the key to how to write a eulogy effectively.

Think of it like building a house: you need a foundation, the main structure, and a roof. For a eulogy, this translates to a clear Opening, a meaningful Body, and a heartfelt Closing. This framework isn’t about being rigid; it’s about taking the pressure off so you can focus on the message itself. This structured approach will benefit you by making the writing process feel logical and achievable.

To make this even clearer, here’s a simple blueprint you can follow. It breaks down the classic three-part structure into its core purpose and what you should aim to include in each section.

Eulogy Structure Blueprint

Section	Purpose	What to Include
Opening	To introduce yourself and set the tone.	Your name, your relationship to the person, and a single, central theme or quality you’ll be speaking about.
Body	To bring the person to life through stories.	2-3 short anecdotes that illustrate the theme you introduced. Show, don’t just tell.
Closing	To provide a loving and final farewell.	A brief summary of your main theme and a direct, personal message to the person you’re honouring.

This table is your road map. It’s designed to guide your thoughts and give you a solid foundation to build upon, preventing that overwhelming “where do I even start?” feeling.

The Opening: Your First Words

Your opening should be brief, clear, and set the right tone. It only needs to do two things: state who you are and introduce the core idea of your tribute. Nothing more, nothing less.

First, introduce yourself and your relationship to the person. Something simple like, “For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Alex, and I was Sarah’s younger brother,” is perfect. It immediately grounds the audience and gives context to your words.

Next, share a single, defining quality you’ll focus on. For instance, “If I had to describe my dad in one word, it would be ‘steadfast’.” This gives your eulogy a central theme and a clear direction right from the get-go.

The Body: Sharing The Stories

The body is the absolute heart of your eulogy. This is where you bring the person to life through the stories and memories you’ve gathered. The key here is to avoid a boring chronological summary of their life. Seriously, no one needs a spoken résumé.

Instead, aim to share two or three distinct anecdotes that showcase their character. These stories are the proof behind the quality you mentioned in your opening.

A story of kindness: You could share a time they went out of their way for a stranger, showing their generosity in action.
A story of humour: Maybe you recall a moment their unique sense of humour turned a bad day around for everyone.
A story of resilience: A story about how they navigated a tough time can speak volumes about their quiet strength.

This thematic approach is far more impactful than just listing dates and achievements. It shows people who they were, rather than just telling them. This is how you create a eulogy that connects.

A great eulogy doesn’t just list facts about a life. It paints a picture. Choose stories that show, don’t just tell, the audience about their unique spirit.

Navigating this emotional complexity while trying to be clear and structured is tough. It demands a level of focus that can feel almost impossible when you’re grieving. If you’re struggling to organise your thoughts, a chat can help you find clarity during this and other challenging life moments.

The Closing: A Heartfelt Farewell

Your closing should bring your eulogy to a gentle, definite end. It’s your chance to tie everything together and offer a final, loving goodbye.

Start by briefly revisiting the central theme. Circle back to that one defining quality you opened with. For example, “So yes, Dad was steadfast. He was the rock we all leaned on, and his quiet strength is a legacy that will stay with us forever.”

Then, speak directly to the person you’re honouring. This is your chance for a final, personal message. It can be as simple as, “We’ll miss you more than words can say. Goodbye, mate.”

This structure isn’t a rigid set of rules, but a supportive guide. Its purpose is to take the guesswork out of the process, allowing you to pour your energy into what really matters: honouring someone you loved with honesty and heart. The values they lived by can be a powerful source of inspiration, and you might find it helpful to reflect on our list of personal values examples as you consider their legacy.

Writing a Draft That Sounds and Feels Authentic

A man in a suit reads a formal document to a woman, likely a eulogy, in a living room.

Alright, you’ve got your memories jotted down and a rough structure in mind. Now it’s time to actually put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard). This is where your notes transform into a tribute that truly sounds and feels like it’s coming from you. This is the core of how to write a eulogy.

The biggest trap people fall into is trying to sound like a professional speechwriter or some kind of poet. Forget that. Right now, the goal is to just be you. Your authenticity is your greatest asset.

Imagine you’re telling these stories to a good mate over a quiet beer. That’s the tone you’re after. Simple, honest language is what will connect with everyone in the room, not a bunch of fancy words you’d never normally use.

Write Like You Talk

Seriously, the key to a genuine eulogy is to write in your own voice. If you wouldn’t say “his effervescent spirit illuminated every room he entered,” then don’t write it. Something like, “He just had this way of making everyone feel good” is a thousand times more powerful because it’s real.

To get into this headspace, just remember a few things that will benefit you during delivery:

Use short sentences. They’re easier to read and much easier to deliver, especially when your emotions are running high.
Keep your words simple. Clear, direct language hits harder than a complicated vocabulary ever will. Honesty is what resonates.
Write for the ear, not the eye. This is a speech. It needs to sound natural when it’s spoken aloud.

Here’s a great trick: read your draft out loud as you go. Your ear will instantly pick up on any clunky phrases or sentences that feel stiff. If you stumble over a line, rewrite it until it flows smoothly off the tongue.

Find Your Central Theme

Your eulogy will have a much bigger impact if it’s built around one or two central ideas about the person. Instead of just listing random stories, try to connect them to a core quality. Was it their unwavering loyalty? Their ridiculous sense of humour? Their quiet, dependable strength?

A theme acts like an anchor. It gives your stories a purpose and the whole tribute a clear focus. This is a fundamental part of learning how to write a eulogy that people will remember. Every story you share should, in some way, point back to that central idea.

What to Avoid When Writing

Just as important as what you put in is what you leave out. A few common mistakes can weaken an otherwise beautiful tribute and accidentally make people feel left out.

Inside Jokes: A shared memory is great, but a joke that only two people in the room will get can make everyone else feel isolated. If you’re going for humour, make sure it’s something everyone can connect with.
Brutal Honesty: This isn’t the time to air old grievances or settle scores. A eulogy is about celebrating a life. Focus on the positive aspects of their character and your relationship with them.
Making It All About You: It’s okay to share your own feelings of loss, but the spotlight has to stay on the person you’re honouring. Frame your grief in the context of their absence, “I’ll really miss his advice,” rather than just dwelling on your own pain.

Think of your tribute as a gift to everyone there. It should offer a clear, loving, and honest picture of the person, letting the audience share in the remembrance and the celebration.

This shift towards authenticity is happening all over. Recent Australian funeral trends show that 83% of us now prefer services that are celebratory and personal, rather than strictly traditional and mournful. Your real, heartfelt words are exactly what people want to hear. You can explore the full report on changing attitudes in Australia for more on this.

Polish It Up With Fresh Eyes

Once you’ve got a first draft down, walk away. Give it a few hours, or even a full day if you can. Coming back with fresh eyes is the best way to spot where things can be improved.

Read it aloud again, slowly. Does it flow? Does it sound like you? Is the core message clear?

This is also the perfect time to check the length. A good eulogy typically runs for about three to five minutes, which is roughly 500 to 800 words. Don’t get hung up on the exact word count, but use it as a guide to make sure you’re not going on for too long or finishing too quickly.

If you’re struggling to get the words right or feel completely overwhelmed, that’s perfectly normal. Sometimes you just need a sounding board. A Your Bro coaching session can offer that grounded support, helping you find clarity when you need it most. It’s not therapy; it’s like having a brother in your corner helping you through tough moments. Book a free discovery call to see how it works.

And if this experience makes you want to get more comfortable with public speaking in general, organisations like Toastmasters Australia offer fantastic, friendly support and practical training.

Preparing to Deliver Your Tribute with Confidence

You’ve got the words on the page. In many ways, the hardest part is behind you. But writing the eulogy is only half the battle. Now, you’ve got to stand up and say it out loud, and that can feel just as tough, if not tougher. Following these steps will benefit you by building the confidence you need.

Don’t worry. A little bit of prep makes all the difference. This isn’t about becoming a world-class public speaker overnight. It’s about feeling grounded enough to honour the person you’re there for, even if your voice shakes a little. This preparation phase is a critical part of how to write a eulogy and deliver it well.

Practice Makes Present

Look, rehearsing your eulogy is non-negotiable. This isn’t about memorising it word-for-word. It’s about getting so familiar with the flow of it that the words feel natural coming out of your mouth. When the emotions hit, that familiarity will be your anchor.

Read it aloud. Then read it aloud again. You’ll quickly find any clunky phrases and get a feel for the natural rhythm of your sentences.

Time yourself, but read at a slow, deliberate pace. Most eulogies run between three and five minutes, and this is how you check if you’re in that sweet spot.

If you can, practise in front of a mirror or, even better, a mate you trust. Saying the words out loud to another person is a game-changer. They can give you some honest feedback on your pacing and whether your tone feels right.

The goal of practice isn’t perfection; it’s preparation. Knowing your stuff means you can look up from the page, make eye contact, and really connect with everyone in the room. You’re sharing this moment with them.

Prepare Your Physical Copy

I don’t care if you think you’ve got it memorised, always bring a physical copy with you. Grief and nerves have a nasty habit of wiping your mind blank at the worst possible moment.

Print it out. Seriously, don’t rely on your phone. A screen going dark, a flat battery, or a notification popping up is the last thing you need.
Use a large font. Bump it up to at least a 14 or 16-point font. It makes it a hell of a lot easier to read at a glance, especially if your hands are a bit shaky.
Double-space the lines. This gives your eyes some breathing room and helps you keep your place without squinting.
Number your pages. It’s a simple thing, but if you drop your notes, you’ll be glad you did.

Managing Your Emotions During Delivery

Let’s be straight about this: you’re going to get emotional. That’s not weakness, mate. It’s love. Everyone in that room gets it. The aim isn’t to bottle up your feelings, but to manage them well enough to get through your tribute.

Keep a glass of water nearby. If you feel a big wave of emotion building, taking a simple pause for a sip is an absolute lifesaver. It gives you a second to breathe and reset without looking flustered.

Don’t ever be afraid to pause. Your breath is the best tool you have for staying grounded. Before you even say the first word, take one deep, slow breath. If you feel your voice starting to crack mid-sentence, just stop. Pause. Take another breath. That silence will feel like an eternity to you, but to everyone else, it’s just a moment of respectful reflection.

Getting a handle on your emotions under pressure is a real skill. If you want to dig deeper, we cover this in our article about improving your emotional intelligence.

It is more than okay to show you’re feeling it. Trying to be a stoic robot often just makes things harder. If the tears come, let them. No one is expecting you to be made of stone.

Facing these moments is tough, and the lead-up can be brutal. If you’re struggling with the pressure and need a grounded perspective, Your Bro coaching can help. A free discovery call can show you how support can build the resilience you need for life’s heaviest moments. For ongoing grief support, reputable services like GriefLine and The Australian Centre for Grief and Bereavement offer professional guidance.

The Questions You’re Probably Asking

Even with a solid plan, a few practical questions are likely nagging at you. That’s completely normal. Most of us don’t find ourselves in this position often, so it’s only natural to feel a bit unsure. Let’s tackle some of the most common things people wonder about when they sit down to figure out how to write a eulogy.

How Long Should a Eulogy Be?

You’ll want to aim for something between three and five minutes. That might not sound like much, but when spoken at a comfortable, unhurried pace, it works out to be around 500 to 800 words.

The goal here isn’t to deliver a marathon speech. It’s about sharing a few potent memories and painting a clear, heartfelt picture of the person you’re honouring. The real impact comes from your sincerity, not the length. A great way to check is to time yourself reading it aloud.

Is It Okay to Use Humour in a Eulogy?

Absolutely, but with one important condition: it has to genuinely reflect the person you’re celebrating. If they were known for a killer sense of humour, a sharp wit, or a knack for finding the funny side of things, a lighthearted story can be a beautiful way to honour their spirit.

The trick is to keep the humour warm, gentle, and inclusive. Steer clear of inside jokes that only a couple of people in the room will get, as this can make others feel excluded. You’re aiming for a shared moment of fond remembrance, not a stand-up routine.

What if I Get Too Emotional to Finish?

This is easily one of the biggest and most understandable fears. First things first: showing emotion isn’t a failure. It’s a sign of how much you cared, and no one in that room is going to judge you for it.

To give yourself a safety net, here are a few practical things you can do:

Bring a printed copy: Use a large, easy-to-read font so you’re not squinting through tears.
Have a backup plan: Before the service, pull a trusted friend or family member aside. Ask if they’d be willing to step in and finish reading if you can’t. Give them a copy just in case.
Embrace the pause: If you feel a wave of emotion coming on, just stop. Take a slow, deep breath. Have a sip of water. The room will wait for you, and they’ll give you all the space you need.

Everyone there is on your side. Your vulnerability is part of the tribute, and it’s a powerful thing.

Do I Need to Memorise the Whole Thing?

Definitely not. In fact, I’d advise against even trying. The pressure to memorise a speech perfectly just adds another layer of stress to an already heavy day. Grief and nerves can make even the sharpest memory go completely blank.

It’s far better to be deeply familiar with what you’ve written than to have it memorised word-for-word. Practice it enough that you can look up from the page and make eye contact with people, but rely on your notes to keep you on track. This lets you stay present and connect with everyone, without the fear of losing your place. This grounded approach is a massive part of delivering a eulogy well.

Navigating life’s toughest moments is never easy, and figuring out how to write a eulogy is one of the hardest things you’ll ever be asked to do. If you need a grounded sounding board to help you find clarity and strength, Your Bro is here. Book a free, no-obligation discovery call and see how coaching can support you.

How to Find Your Passion and Build a Life You Actually Love

yourbro January 4, 2026 9:26 pm

Let’s be real for a moment. Being told to “just find your passion” is some of the most frustrating, unhelpful advice you can get. It makes it sound like your purpose is a single, mythical treasure buried somewhere, and if you just dig hard enough, you’ll have a life-changing epiphany.

For you, and for most of us, life just doesn’t work that way. It’s not a lightning strike of inspiration. This pressure to find the one thing often leaves you feeling stuck, guilty, or even broken because nothing seems to ignite that magical spark everyone talks about.

The problem isn’t you; it’s the whole premise. This guide is here to give you a practical, actionable plan that puts you back in control.

A thoughtful young man with a map, notebook, and compass, planning an adventure or seeking direction. How to find your passion.

From Myth to Your Action Plan

Here’s the truth I’ve learned from years of coaching people through this exact struggle: Passions aren’t found, they’re built. They grow from a flicker of curiosity you already have, nurtured with a bit of effort and real-world experience.

It’s less of a sudden discovery and more of a slow burn that you develop over time.

So, let’s ditch the frustrating spiritual quest. Your real goal is much more practical and, honestly, much more achievable: to build a life that actually aligns with your values, strengths, and curiosities. When you frame it like that, it stops being this overwhelming search and becomes a manageable project you can start today.

“The moment you start viewing every interest through the lens of income, it becomes another task, another job, another performance. Passion doesn’t thrive under pressure, it needs breathing room.”

This shift in mindset is the key to your success. It gives you permission to explore, to play, and even to “fail” without the crushing weight of expectation that every interest needs to become a career. This creates the space you need for experimentation, which is where the real magic happens.

Before we dive into the ‘how’, let’s lock in this mindset shift. It’s the foundation that will make everything else possible for you.

The Mindset Shift That Unlocks Your Potential

The Old Way (Keeps You Stuck)	Your New Actionable Approach
Waiting for a lightning bolt of inspiration.	Actively following small sparks of your curiosity.
Searching for one perfect, lifelong “calling”.	Building multiple interests and skills over time.
Believing passion should feel easy and effortless.	Understanding that passion grows through your effort.
Fearing you’ll pick the “wrong” thing.	Running small experiments to see what sticks for you.
Needing to have it all figured out before you start.	Taking small, messy actions to gather real data.

Seeing the difference? One approach keeps you stuck in your head, while the other gets you out into the world, learning and growing. This is about empowering you to take action.

A Practical Framework for Your Discovery

To make this journey less abstract and more concrete for you, I’ve broken it down into a simple, three-part framework. This isn’t about vague encouragement; it’s an actionable path you can actually walk.

Here’s your game plan:

Look Inward (Self-Discovery): You’ll start by gathering data on the most important subject: you. This means getting brutally honest about where your energy goes, doing a proper audit of your skills (the ones you enjoy using!), and pinpointing the kinds of problems you genuinely get a kick out of solving.
Look Outward (Exploration): Next, you’ll take those internal insights and put them to the test in the real world. I’ll show you how to run tiny, low-risk “micro-experiments” to explore your interests without having to quit your job or blow up your life.
Take Action (Integration): Finally, you’ll connect the dots. This is where you learn how to turn a promising spark into something tangible, whether that’s a new hobby that lights you up, a side project, or even the beginnings of a career pivot that feels right for you.

This structured approach takes the guesswork out of the equation. It’s not about waiting around for inspiration to strike; it’s about giving you the tools to proactively build a more engaging and purposeful life, one intentional step at a time.

Doing a Personal Self-Audit to Uncover What Really Drives You

Before you can build a life that feels right, you first need to understand your own operating system. This isn’t about some woo-woo navel-gazing; it’s about gathering real, practical data on yourself so you can make smarter decisions.

Just like a business audits its finances to see where the money is really going, you need to audit your personal landscape. Where do your time, energy, and focus actually go each day? Answering this will give you the clarity you’ve been looking for.

This process moves you past the vague question of “what’s my passion?” and onto much more solid ground. You’re looking for patterns in what genuinely lights you up versus what leaves you feeling completely drained. Think of it as laying the foundation of self-awareness you’ll need before you start looking at career paths or new hobbies.

You can’t draw a map to where you’re going if you don’t even know where you are. This self-audit is your “You Are Here” pin on that map.

Uncover Clues with Targeted Journaling

Just writing in a journal is fine, but to get results, you need to be more strategic. You’re not just rambling about your day; you’re hunting for specific clues about what makes you tick. The goal is to get past the surface-level answers and discover what truly motivates you.

Instead of asking yourself massive, overwhelming questions, try these more pointed prompts. Just spend 10-15 minutes on one or two of them. Don’t censor yourself; the answers are for your eyes only, and they hold the key.

What kind of problems do I actually enjoy solving? Think beyond your job. Do you get a kick out of organising a messy garage, figuring out a complex video game strategy, or helping a mate untangle a personal drama? The answer reveals how your mind works.
What topics do I find myself reading about or watching videos on in my spare time, with no real goal in mind? This points directly to your natural, unfiltered curiosities.
When did I last lose track of time? What was I doing? This is a huge sign you were in a state of ‘flow,’ where the challenge you were facing was perfectly matched to your skills.
What do my friends or family always ask for my help with? This often points to skills you take for granted in yourself, but that others clearly see and value in you.

This isn’t a one-and-done thing. Revisit these questions weekly to see what new patterns emerge. You’re building a library of personal data that will start pointing you toward genuinely fulfilling activities.

Run a Personal Energy Audit

Passion isn’t just an idea in your head; it’s a feeling. It’s the energy you get from an activity. To find it, you need to become a detective of your own energy levels. A simple Energy Audit is a seriously powerful tool that will give you instant clarity.

For one week, track your main activities each day and give them a quick rating based on how they made you feel. You can use a notebook or a basic spreadsheet with three columns:

Activity	Time Spent	Energy Level (After)
Team meeting about budgets	1 hour	Drained (-2)
Helping a new team member	30 mins	Energised (+1)
Scrolling Instagram	45 mins	Numb (0)
Brainstorming a new project	1 hour	Excited (+2)

After a week, you’ll have a clear, data-driven picture of what gives you energy and what sucks it away. You might be shocked to find that a small, overlooked part of your day is actually the most rewarding bit.

Key Takeaway: Your energy is your most valuable currency in this search. By tracking where it goes, you can consciously start investing more of it in the things that fill your tank, not empty it.

This audit gives you concrete evidence, cutting through the confusion of what you think you should enjoy versus what you actually do.

Map Your Skills and Curiosities

The final piece of your self-audit is to create a simple inventory of your skills. This has nothing to do with polishing your resume; it’s about getting an honest look at what you can do and where you want to grow, helping you connect your interests to real-world actions.

Grab a piece of paper and divide it into two columns:

Skills I Have & Enjoy Using: List everything you’re good at that you genuinely like doing. This could be anything from ‘explaining complex ideas simply,’ to ‘building detailed spreadsheets,’ or ‘making people feel comfortable at a party.’ Be honest with yourself.
Skills I Want to Develop: What are you curious about? This could be anything. Maybe it’s ‘learning basic graphic design,’ ‘getting better at public speaking,’ or ‘understanding how to code.’

Looking at these two lists side-by-side will spark powerful connections. For example, if you enjoy explaining complex ideas and you’re curious about graphic design, perhaps creating educational infographics is a path worth exploring for you. This simple map turns your abstract interests into potential micro-experiments you can actually test.

If you’re a young bloke in Sydney, scrolling TikTok late at night and feeling a bit directionless, know that you’re far from alone. The Australia digital health coaching market, which includes services helping people find their purpose, hit USD 197.4 million in revenue in 2024. That number is projected to more than double to USD 409.6 million by 2030, driven by a massive demand from young Aussies just like you, wrestling with a lack of purpose in a world full of noise. It just shows how many people are out there actively looking for guidance. You can find out more about the rise of digital coaching in Australia.

Right, so all that soul-searching is great, but it’s pretty useless if it doesn’t lead to you actually doing something. The insights you’ve pulled together from your self-audit? They’re your starting line, not the finish. Now you get to move from thinking to doing. It’s time to take what you’ve uncovered and put it to the test in the real world.

Now, hold on. Forget any dramatic ideas about quitting your job tomorrow to become a potter or packing up and moving to Italy. That’s the kind of high-stakes pressure that leads straight to paralysis. Instead, you’re going to use what I call ‘micro-experiments’. These are small, low-risk, and almost always low-cost ways for you to take your curiosities for a test drive.

This whole approach is about one thing: gathering data. Every experiment, whether it feels like a “win” or a “flop,” is just information for you. It completely removes the fear of getting it wrong and reframes the entire process as pure exploration. You’re not committing to a new life path; you’re just trying something out for an afternoon.

This is all about building on the foundation you’ve already laid. The simple process of journaling, auditing your energy, and analysing your skills gives you the raw material you need to design your first experiments.

Diagram illustrating a three-step self-audit process for personal and professional growth.

This three-step flow: “Journal, Audit, and Analyse Skills” gives you everything you need to create targeted micro-experiments that actually line up with who you are.

Designing Your First Experiment

A solid micro-experiment for you needs to be specific, time-bound, and low-stakes. The goal is for you to get a genuine feel for an activity without needing a massive commitment of time, money, or ego. The trick is to take a big, vague interest and shrink it down to its smallest possible, actionable step.

Let’s look at how this works in practice. Notice how you can turn a fuzzy idea into a concrete, manageable task.

Your Vague Interest: “I think I might like coding.”
- Your Micro-Experiment: Complete a free, two-hour ‘Introduction to Python’ tutorial on YouTube this Saturday afternoon.
Your Vague Interest: “Maybe digital marketing is for me.”
- Your Micro-Experiment: Offer to run the social media for a local charity or a mate’s small business for one month, committing to just three posts a week.
Your Vague Interest: “I’ve always been curious about woodworking.”
- Your Micro-Experiment: Sign up for a one-day beginner’s workshop at a local community centre to build a simple birdhouse.

Each of these experiments delivers a real, tangible experience. Trust me, you’ll learn far more from two hours of actually writing code than you will from 20 hours of watching videos about what it’s like to be a coder.

The Power of Data Collection

Think of yourself as a scientist studying a fascinating subject: you. The point of each micro-experiment isn’t to decide if this is your “one true passion” for life. It’s just to collect data that will guide your next step.

After you finish an experiment, give yourself just 15 minutes to reflect. Don’t overthink it. Just jot down some quick notes to these questions.

Questions to Ask Yourself After Your Experiment:

Energy Check: Did this activity leave me feeling more energised or more drained than when I started?
Flow State: Did I lose track of time at any point, or was I constantly watching the clock?
Problem-Solving: What specific bits of the activity did I enjoy most? Was it the creative brainstorming, the technical troubleshooting, or seeing the final result?
Curiosity Level: Am I more curious to learn more about this now, or has my interest kind of faded?

This process turns your vague feelings into usable insights. You might discover you loved the logical puzzle of coding but hated staring at a screen for hours. That’s a crucial piece of data for you! It tells you to look for other things that involve similar problem-solving skills but in a totally different environment.

You’re not looking for a perfect score on the first try. You’re looking for clues. A “failed” experiment that shows you what you don’t like is just as valuable as one that confirms an interest.

This approach keeps you moving forward, stopping that “analysis paralysis” that comes from trying to map out the perfect path from your armchair.

Creating a System for Your Exploration

To keep your momentum going, it really helps to build a simple system for your experiments. Don’t just do one and stop. Aim to run one small experiment every couple of weeks. This builds a powerful habit of curiosity and action that will lead you to a breakthrough.

Here’s a simple framework to organise your thoughts and keep you on track.

My Interest Area	My Micro-Experiment Idea	My Time/Cost Commitment	What I Hope to Learn About Myself
Graphic Design	Design a simple logo for a fictional brand using a free tool like Canva.	3 hours / $0	Do I enjoy the creative process of visual branding?
Writing	Write a 500-word blog post on a topic from my self-audit and post it on a free platform.	4 hours / $0	Does the process of structuring my thoughts and writing them down feel rewarding to me?
Public Speaking	Join a local Toastmasters club as a guest for one meeting.	2 hours / ~$20 guest fee	Can I handle the nerves, and do I enjoy the challenge of speaking to a group?

This structure makes your exploration intentional. It turns a chaotic search into a clear project with measurable steps and learning goals. Over time, you’ll build a rich portfolio of experiences that paint a clear picture of what truly engages you.

This is how you find your passion, not by waiting for a lightning bolt, but by actively building a life aligned with your curiosity, one small experiment at a time.

Overcoming the Fear and Paralysis Holding You Back

You’ve done the hard yards on the internal work. You’ve even got a few micro-experiments lined up, ready to go. Then, it hits you: a brick wall of fear.

It’s that little voice whispering, “What if I fail?” or “What will people think?” This is exactly where your journey to find your passion can grind to a screeching halt.

Let me tell you, this paralysis is completely normal. Stepping outside your comfort zone is bloody terrifying. The goal isn’t to get rid of the fear. Your real mission is to learn how to act despite it.

You need to treat these mental roadblocks just like any other problem, by breaking them down into smaller, more manageable pieces. And it all starts with getting brutally honest about what’s really holding you back.

Name Your Fears to Tame Them

A vague, undefined fear feels huge and insurmountable. But when you drag it kicking and screaming into the light, it often shrinks. This is the core idea behind a powerful technique called ‘fear-setting’. Instead of setting goals, you map out your fears in detail to regain control.

Grab a piece of paper and draw three columns. This simple exercise can be an absolute game-changer for you.

Define: What’s the absolute worst-case scenario if you try this new thing and it doesn’t work out? Get specific. Don’t just write “I’ll fail.” Write “I’ll spend $50 on a workshop and feel like I wasted a Saturday.”
Prevent: What small, practical steps could you take to stop that worst-case from happening, or at least reduce the odds? For the workshop example, you could read a few reviews or watch some free videos on the topic first to see if you’re genuinely interested.
Repair: If the worst does happen, what could you do to get back to where you are now? In this case, you’d be out $50 and a few hours, but you’d have gained solid data about what you don’t enjoy. The “damage” is tiny.

When you see it laid out like this, you start to realise most of your fears are temporary and reversible. It’s rarely the catastrophe your mind makes it out to be.

Breaking Free from Outside Expectations

Another huge source of paralysis is the weight of other people’s expectations. You worry about what your parents, partners, or mates will think if you stray from the “sensible” path. This pressure can be suffocating, making you second-guess your own gut feelings.

It’s absolutely critical for you to learn how to separate their definition of success from your own. Whose life are you actually living? Sometimes, your deepest fears aren’t about your own failure, but about disappointing others.

This journey is yours and yours alone. Giving yourself permission to pursue something just for you, not for status, not for a paycheque, but for the pure joy of it, is one of the most freeing things you can do.

This might mean having some tough conversations, or it might just mean quietly giving yourself permission to explore your interests without needing anyone else’s approval. Your future self will thank you for it.

Using Action to Defeat Analysis Paralysis

Sometimes the roadblock isn’t fear, but “analysis paralysis”, endlessly researching, planning, and thinking without ever actually doing anything. You get stuck trying to find the perfect first step. The best way for you to break this cycle is with ridiculously small actions.

Enter the ‘five-minute rule’.

Whatever it is you’re putting off, just commit to doing it for five minutes. That’s it. If you want to learn guitar, pick it up and watch one beginner tutorial for five minutes. Curious about writing? Open a document and just type for five minutes.

Often, starting is the hardest part. This tiny commitment tricks your brain into bypassing that initial resistance. More often than not, you’ll find you keep going long after the five minutes are up, building momentum effortlessly.

This principle of using discipline to build momentum is incredibly powerful. For instance, look at the rise of digital fitness coaching in Australia. The market soared to USD 242.42 million in 2024 and is projected to hit USD 437.88 million by 2033. This growth is partly driven by young men realising that the discipline gained from fitness gives them the mental toughness to pursue other passions.

Turning a Spark of Interest into a Tangible Plan

Alright, you’ve done a few micro-experiments and felt that genuine flicker of excitement. Don’t underestimate this moment. It’s a huge step, moving you from just being curious to knowing there’s something real there worth digging into.

But what now? This is the exact point where so many people get stuck. That tiny flame of interest feels great, but they have no idea how to stop it from fizzling out.

The trick is to shift gears from random exploration to intentional planning. It’s about building a solid bridge between a fleeting interest and an actual, tangible goal you can work towards. This isn’t about making a rash, life-changing decision overnight. It’s a methodical process of connecting the dots from your self-audit and experiments to create a realistic plan that actually fits your life.

Map Your Potential Pathways

Before you can build a plan, you need a destination. A newfound passion doesn’t automatically have to become your next career. You need to be brutally honest with yourself about what role you genuinely want this to play in your life.

Generally, you’ve got three main pathways to think about:

A Fulfilling Hobby: This is all about your pure enjoyment, with zero pressure to make a cent. It’s about carving out time for something that recharges you, whether that’s weekend woodworking, finally learning the guitar, or mastering landscape photography.
A Side Hustle: Here, you start exploring ways to earn a bit of income from your interest without quitting your day job. This could be anything from selling handmade goods online to offering freelance writing services or coaching the local footy team on weekends.
A New Career Trajectory: This is the big one, a deliberate pivot in your professional life. It requires the most research and planning, as you’ll need to understand the industry, what qualifications you might need, and what the job prospects really look like.

Getting clear on which path feels right for you right now is absolutely critical. It defines the scale of your plan and keeps your expectations in check, which stops a joyful hobby from being crushed under the weight of financial pressure.

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking every passion has to become a paycheque. Sometimes, the most valuable thing an interest gives you is a sense of joy and purpose that has nothing to do with your work life.

Build a Realistic Action Plan

Once you’ve got a potential pathway in mind, it’s time to break it down into small, achievable steps. A vague goal like “become a graphic designer” is completely overwhelming and just leads to paralysis. A proper, structured plan, on the other hand, builds the momentum you need.

Start by working backwards. If you want to end up at your chosen destination, what skills, knowledge, or resources would you need to get there?

Example Scenario: Your Interest in Podcasting

Let’s say your experiments with recording and editing audio felt amazing, and you’re thinking about turning it into a side hustle.

Define Your Next Milestone: Launch the first three episodes of your podcast. That’s specific and measurable.
Identify Necessary Skills: You’ll need to learn basic audio editing, how to structure an episode, and some marketing fundamentals to get it out there.
List Your Actionable Steps:
- Research and buy a decent entry-level microphone.
- Complete a 4-hour online course on the editing software Audacity.
- Brainstorm and outline your first five episode ideas.
- Record and edit episode one by the end of the month.

See how that works? A step-by-step approach turns a massive ambition into a simple to-do list, making your progress feel inevitable instead of impossible.

The Value of Accountability and Guidance

Making a plan is one thing; actually sticking to it when life gets in the way is another beast entirely. This is where accountability becomes a game-changer for your success.

Sharing your goals with a mate you trust, joining a community of people on a similar path, or working with a coach can give you the structure and support you need to stay on track.

There’s a reason the life coaching industry in Australia is booming. Oceania alone clocked $195 million in coaching revenue in 2023, which is part of a global $5.34 billion industry. Research consistently shows that coaching delivers a huge return on investment and can boost self-esteem by as much as 80% giving people like you the confidence to actually chase their goals. It just goes to show how valuable a bit of external guidance can be when you’re turning a spark into a real plan.

If you feel you need that external push and a solid framework to hold you accountable, exploring professional life coaching services can provide the personalised support to turn your plan into reality.

Got Questions About Finding Your Passion?

As you start making progress, it’s completely normal for a few nagging questions to pop up. These are the usual sticking points that can throw a spanner in the works just when you feel like you’re getting somewhere. Let’s tackle them head-on so you can keep moving forward.

Think of this as your no-nonsense guide to getting unstuck. The goal here isn’t just to throw information at you, but to help you navigate these mental roadblocks with confidence.

What if I Have Too Many Interests?

First off, this is a quality problem to have. It beats feeling like nothing excites you. The trick is to shift your mindset from “I have to pick just one” to “Which one will I explore first?”

Don’t let the sheer number of options freeze you in your tracks.

Find the Theme: Lay out all your interests. Is there a common thread tying them together? Maybe your interest in graphic design, woodworking, and creative writing all point to a deeper desire you have to build something from nothing.
Run an ‘Energy’ Check: Go back to your energy audit. Which of these interests gives you the biggest jolt of genuine excitement right now? Your gut knows. Trust it and start there. The others aren’t going anywhere.
Try a ‘Mash-Up’: Sometimes, your real magic happens where two interests collide. If you love fitness and writing, you could start a killer fitness blog. If you’re into tech and music, you could get lost in digital audio production.

Your aim isn’t to find the ‘one’ perfect thing for life. It’s simply to start with what’s pulling you in the most today. This isn’t a lifelong contract; it’s just your next step.

How Long Does This Whole Process Take?

This is probably the most common question I get, and the honest answer is there’s no set timeline for you. It’s different for everyone. Finding what truly clicks with who you are is a marathon, not a sprint. Some people have a lightbulb moment in a few months. For others, it’s a slow burn that unfolds over years.

Trying to rush the process is the fastest way to get frustrated and quit. Your only job is to stay curious, keep running small experiments, and pay attention to what the results are telling you.

Forget the deadline and focus on consistent, small actions instead. The journey of self-discovery is where you’ll find most of the good stuff, anyway. If you’re looking for more ideas on how to keep your momentum going, check out some of the other articles on our blog.

What if My Passion Doesn’t Become a Career?

This is a big one. You might get tripped up by the myth that every single passion needs to be monetised. Not only is that untrue, but it can also be incredibly destructive to your motivation.

Seriously, putting financial pressure on a new interest is the quickest way to suck all the joy out of it for yourself.

Protect Your Hobby: It is 100% okay to have a passion that is just for you. Its only job might be to bring you joy, slash your stress levels, and make your life richer. That’s more than enough of a return on your time.
Redefine ‘Success’ for Yourself: Success doesn’t always come with a paycheque. It could be the feeling of finishing a personal project, mastering a new skill, or simply having an outlet that recharges you after a tough week.

Sometimes, the most valuable role a passion can play is to make the rest of your life better, not to replace your job. Give your interests room to breathe without the crushing weight of expectation.

At Your Bro, we believe that finding your path is about taking consistent, intentional action, not waiting around for a magical answer. If you’re ready to move past the questions and start building a concrete plan with real accountability, a good first step is our free, no-BS discovery call. Find out more and book your spot at https://yourbro.com.au.

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